Well, well, well, shitty fashion, we meet again. Now before I get into this subject, I’m gonna preface it with the following statement: If you’re a nurse, doctor’s assistant, or work in a dentist’s office, this isn’t about you. Until you wear your Crocs in public like you’re starting some new revolution. You’re not. Trust me.

I’ve noticed a lotta people out there rocking these hideous plastic joints all over the place, but regardless – you can’t dress these shits up. Ever. With anything. For any reason. Got it? Good. Crocs are horrific to look at, but by all accounts, they’re hella comfortable. Good for you. Keep em as your house shoes, but once you enter the public eye, brace yourself for ridicule.

I dunno if it’s a sign of the times or a lack of common fashion sense that people are out there with jeans, a hoodie, and Crocs. I have the most dumbfounded look on my face whenever I see such an aesthetic atrocity. I’m borderline uncomfortable standing next to anyone who isn’t wearing scrubs and Crocs. Ladies, they’re not cute. Period. I don’t care what color they are, they aren’t cute. Fellas – if you wear em, you’re a lost cause anyways. Personally, I’d rather wear fuzzy house slippers out than ever be seen dead or alive in a pair of Crocs. Now, you’re probably saying to yourself – “This Anthony kid is a fucking jerk.” If you said that to my mother, she would more than likely agree with that sentiment. However, my mother would never slip ten toes into a pair of these holey, unholy, wholly unfashionable foot contraptions. Ever.

Even these for dudes –

Yup, those make me unbearably nauseous as well. If you really, really, really feel compelled to wear a pair of Crocs – apply for nursing school. At least then you’ll have a reason to wear such blasphemy.