Prescribed Fuckery

I know I’m not the only one that’s seen commercials for those “popular” prescription drugs that inadvertently have WORSE side effects than the shit you’re tryna cure. If you had a severely upset stomach, why would you wanna pop a pill that might make you spill your guts all over the inside of your jeans?

Of course, the benefits of drugs generally outweigh the possible side effects, but hypothetically – if I’m using a topical skin ointment for acne, why the fuck would I wanna use it if it could “potentially cause exacerbated skin irritation and/or swelling and redness”?

Check these drugs, treatments, and exacerbated side effects:

Wellbutrin (used for treating depression): “new or worsening mental or mood changes (eg, concentration problems, depression, panic attacks, aggressiveness, agitation, anxiety, impulsiveness, irritability, hostility, exaggerated feeling of well-being; suicidal thoughts or tendencies.” Assuming I didn’t wanna be depressed, why would I pop pills that’d make me wanna kill someone…or myself?

Accutane (used for treating severe acne): “bizarre, aggressive, or violent behavior; Crohn’s disease/ulcerative colitis; SEVERE BIRTH DEFECTS in pregnant women; chest pain or pounding in the chest; rectal bleeding; thoughts of suicide; red, swollen, blistered, or peeling skin.” Jesus, if my main concern was how that one little zit on my face looked, I shouldn’t use a cream that’ll melt my face off like a double scoop during a hot summer day.

Ambien (sleep aid): “SLEEPDRIVING and AMNESIA.” Yup, I needa sleep, but I wanna cruise too. Shit, lemme take one of these and disavow any knowledge that I plowed thru someone’s lawn on the influence of my prescribed sleep aid.

Chantix (used to help quit smoking): “changes in behavior, agitation, depressed mood, suicidal thoughts or actions when attempting to quit smoking while taking CHANTIX or after stopping CHANTIX”. I’ve quit smoking before cold turkey and been overly irritated. Imagine taking a nicotine replacement patch and still wanting to tear the heads off of people just for the fuck of it?

Celebrex (used to treat arthritis): “Death”. Yup, guess that pretty much makes my mind up. I’d rather be stiff from arthritis than rigormortis. That’s just me tho. Have at it if you think otherwise.

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