I get it – I may, from time to time, dabble in self-medication per the green leaf (understatement of the day), but reports state that there’s a real life Mr. Nice Guy out there, pitching trees…and advertising via business card.

Whitman resident weedman, we’ll call him Mr. S., was initially caught on top by cops for trying to get a girl into his car in a parking lot in Whitman on Saturday, and officers had to deal with a smorgasbord of self-incriminating shit all over dude’s car. In addition to the business cards, which included his “business hours”, the phrase of death “for sale” and phone number, the officers found baggies, bud, scales, and buckets. Wow, dude must have had fire if he was burned out enough to put everything besides his address on the card, but fuck. How do you include your phone number, son? And to PASS the cards out? You might as well walk around with a fucking target on your back.

Don’t get it fucked up – I support the cause. Herb is the one drug that isn’t causing people behind the wheel to crash the car, isn’t a huge reason for home invasions, and is generally a feel good, without the addictive qualities that other drugs have. But this dude right here? Absolutely needa quit trying to pitch product because your approach is beyond fucking laughable. That’s about as bad as dudes with shirts, showing how to whip up crack rock. And they’re out there.

I really hope this dude only had schwag tho – it’d be a damn shame to let actual, factual good ass weed go to waste. Then again, this dude wouldn’t know good weed if a dude handed him a business card advertising…oh. Right.